My Life - Part IV

This was a government office that we use to work for and it was kind of self-contained area. Most people use to live on premises or very close to premises. Everyone use to go home for their lunch. I was the lonely soul. Some times I use to eat in mess and sometime I use to skip lunch completely. After our engagement, now that Paro use to bring lunch for me, we started having lunch together. No one use to be in office. We respected each other and as soon as we finished lunch, I use to go for a walk and Paro went to see her group of other operators. It was like no one know about our relationship unless we wanted someone to know.
One day, one of the office assistant came back early (he was fasting or something) and he stared at both of us having lunch. Whole 20 minutes, he kept staring at us. I was getting pissed off but Paro stopped me from saying anything. His name was QUE-BALL (DomKavla). After that day, QueBall started eves dropping when we use to have our lunch together. I had asked Paro’s cousine also not to break the news for a while.
One day QueBall came to me after I finished lunch and my walk.
QueBall: “Are you acting smart?”
Me: “Why do you think so?”
QueBall: “I have been observing that you have been spending time with Paro everyday for lunch”.
Me: “So?”
QueBall: “You don’t know she is very nice girl. If she goes around with you her name will be spoiled”.
Me: “I think she is matured enough to understand that and if you have problem with that why don’t you tell her. Why are you complaining to me”
QueBall: “I will make sure that she does not see you again”
Me: “Sure, go ahead”

Next day, again he saw us having lunch together. Paro was narrating while having lunch how QueBall came to her and told her that I am not a very good person and she should keep her distance. He also told her that I have a girl-friend whose photo was on my desk and he claims that he works at night… blah… blah… blah…

We were eating, chatting and laughing and QueBall walks in the office. To irritate him, I started giggling looking at him. QueBall was very upset. He was kind of a person who use to think that he knows everything and people should listen to him.

After a while, he came to me and said, “I will complain to the chairman of the office”. I said, with pleasure, if you don’t complain, I am going to go and complain. Just wait till end of the month. Actually, I was waiting for month end to break the news because if I break the news, I will have to give sweets. There were so many people in office that I would spend like 25% of my salary on it.

He kept quite, month end was just around the corner. On first of next month, I got 3 large packets of sweets and went directly into chairman’s room. Gave him sweets and gave news. He congratulated to me. Then I went to my department head and did the same thing. Went to all other offices and gave sweets to everyone and came back only when people left for lunch. QueBall was sitting there. As soon as I walked in he tell me, “why are you spoiling someone’s name”. I asked, “whose name am I spoiling? I hope I am not spoiling your name, at least”. He started scolding me for spreading the news that me and Paro were engaged. Actually when I distributed sweets, no one believed me. And Paro kept mum. She never accepted nor denied the news. We were having fun with everyone. In few minutes, Paro walked in with her lunch box in my office. QueBall started scolding her too. We both were looking at each other and smiling. Finally, I asked him, what is your problem? If she is not complaining what are you complaining about? Stop it and mind your own business. He was sooo angry and we were having fun. After lunch, I distributed sweets in my own department. QueBall did not take it first but when Paro’s cousin took it and congratulated me, he said “Are you serious? Is it true that you are engaged to Paro?”
I asked him, “Do you think I am so dumb that I will distribute sweets in whole world?” If you have had common sense, you would have believed me.
My family, her family and everyone at our place know each other; I wonder what YOUR problem is. But henceforth if you try to get in our mess, I am going to kick you ass.

Since then, he just kept quite and we continued our daily lunch program. Now we had nothing to hide. While leaving office, I use to go out hand-in-hand with her, drop her up to bus-stop and come back. Dunno why but I use to like to work alone in office during late evenings and nights when no one use to be around. I could do more work when I was alone.

During all this, I have been working late nights and my project for the year was coming to an end. I did wonderfully as a result, the office wanted me to place permanently in the office. (The project for which I was recruited was a temporary position). And here started politics. My team lead has been a temp for 6 years and she was still temp whereas I was going to be permanent and she was upset about it.

She started creating problems for me. During one of my review with deputy director for permanent position, office superintendent said “He is fantastic programmer, we don’t get such programmers often, we need him for sure and I request you to sanction the position”. Basically, it was case presentation to create a new position in organization which was then to be referred to Ministry of HRD under which this organization use to run.
Then she said, if he is so good, why is he working at such low salary here. There are so many jobs available outside. Why does he not go outside. All she wanted to prove that I am mediocre and she deserves the position most. Well, that moment I decided that I will not work here any more, my next job has to be something better. So I went to my department head with my resignation letter. He is such a gem of a person, I have not seen such people in my life. Even though he was at such a high position, he is so humble. He requested me to stay back for sometime. I agreed. I said “Sir, I give you 2 months. I will do what I have to for 2 months but by then you better find another person. I am not going to be here after 2 months”. He agreed.

Later during those 2 months I was asked to go to Kanpur on official business and I went for 7 days. As soon as I was back I decided that I don’t want to continue anymore. My department head also was changed during the time. So there was no more moral binding to hold me back to my job.

My Life - Part III

Continued...

it was a wait worth. You know the feeling? It is like you want no one to know about your affair and still you want to shout at top of your voice to let the whole world know about your love. I loved that feeling in a way. This went on for few months (4 months to be precise). Paro tried to keep her head for her studies and exams but I guess after February, she was all thinking about me. (I can just guess how she felt, even today she does not share her feeling and that has been one of my greatest complain to her).

Once her exams were over, we were more like free birds. In fact even before her exams got over, I started planning about breaking the news at our home. I had already started "leaking" news at my home. I took my mom and dad to confidence. One of the days, I took her to my place to meet my parents. Dad liked her. Mom had her reservations. Dad being astrologer asked for her horoscope. Paro did not have one but we had her birth date and other details. Once dad had compared horoscope, he managed to convince Mom. Mom was OK after that but the biggest task was to break the news at Paro's parents and "guardians".

I went to Baroda to talk to my Uncle. My dad had Parkinson and he could not do much so I had to take help from one of my uncle. I started pressing Paro to break the news at her place but she was too scared to do that. In the mean time, her parents and guardians arranged a meeting with one of the suitable match for her. She came to work next day all crying and not able to talk to me as if she did something wrong. We had a good discussion on the subject. I tried explaining her that she needs to make up her mind and share information as home before it is too late. This was question of our future. Damn! I could not let her slip away from me. I had enough loss for once in past and I did not want to repeat it. It that would happen, I will die for sure. At her place her uncle was the person who was kind of decision maker for her family. So I decided to break the news to him first. As mentioned earlier, Shamita, Paro's cousin sister was working in my office. So the first thing I did was to take her in confidence. I mentioned the whole thing to her without stating anybody's name and asked for help. She was all excited to help without knowing. So I told her how she should approach the person she is going to talk. She was all ready. Finally, I took her to her place and slowly told her she needs to speak to her father. That was kind of cruel joke to her but it was question of my future. I had to be little smart here. She was all scared to talk to her father. I said, I am here, speak to him. If he blasts, I will handle it.

The talk went fine, actually better than I had expected. I just had to pitch in here and there. Paro's uncle knew me for a while as I use to go to drop Paro at their place for a while. He was just concerned that what do I hold in future for their daughter. Before that we had to break the news to Paro's parents. Her father was paralytic. We decided to break the news to her parents same evening. So I dropped her to her place and helped her gain her confidence.

I was anxiously waiting to know what happened. Paro went home and wrote down everything on a paper and gave the letter to her mom. Once her Mom read the letter, it was kind of all-hell-broke-loose. They both cried all night and Paro was like all shaky in the morning. When she came to office, her eyes were swollen and she was trembling.

I consoled her and tried giving some more confidence to her. After a day of going back and forth, her mom agreed to visit our place.

June 13th 1993 was the date when they came to my place. To see my economic background and to make sure their daughter will be in a decent place once she marries to me. It was to pleasure to meet them first time and show them around. They felt very comfortable once they visited our place and met my parents. We had engagement ceremony immediately.

We were from different community, caste and mother tongue and that is was so much ruckus around our getting together. Being with my parents with most of the time, I wanted to marry a girl who respects my parents and take care of them as her own. Paro was one I thought will be a good match for me.

This was union of two families. We all were so happy. And guess what, from next day, Paro started getting me lunch from home for me.